Anal Sex & Prostate Pleasure; All your questions answered!

Reading Anal Sex & Prostate Pleasure; All your questions answered! 10 minutes Next Your short guide to BDSM in 2023!

Anal Sex & Prostate Pleasure; All your questions answered!

More often than not, couples shy away from anal sex because they don’t get pleasure out of it. But what if I told you anal sex could be one of the most pleasurable options out there? With anal sex, you can forget your contraceptives and fret not about getting knocked up ever again. It is not only pleasing to both of you but can also give you some earth-shattering orgasms! 

Here, I’ve listed down some of the most frequently asked questions with regard to anal pleasure. Be it anal sex or oral pleasures; here you will find the answers to all your queries!

1. Is lube necessary? What if I try out with spit or vaseline?
Lube is absolutely necessary! Without proper lube, anal is not only painful but also makes you more susceptible to sexually transmitted infections, like gonorrhoea and HIV. That’s because whenever you have anal sex without lubes, it is going to create tiny cracks and tears on your rectum walls. And these tears create openings in the skin, potentially allowing infection-causing pathogens to enter. Even if you use lube, some tearing might still happen, depending on the amount you use, the size of whatever you’re putting up your ass, and the level of friction involved. Still, adding a ton of lube to the mix makes you less likely to tear and more likely to have fun.

2. What kind of lube is perfect for anal?

When it comes to lube, you pretty much have three options:

Oil-based and silicone-based lubes are thicker and longer-lasting, making them great for anal play. But keep in mind that oil-based lubes (like coconut or olive oil) can break down condoms and render them less effective, so if you’re using a condom, steer clear of that kind of lube.

Also be aware not to use silicon-based lubes if you’re using silicon dildos as for obvious reasons, the lubes will erode the dildos and cause problems. But don’t worry—if you have a preference for silicone-based lubes, there are other toy materials out there that will work just fine, such as glass or metal.
With all that in mind, if you’re engaging in anal play, using condoms, and/or using silicone toys, you’ll typically want to stick with water-based lube.

3. Is it safe to use toys? What toys shall I start with?

It is perfectly safe to use toys, BUT not all toys are anal-safe! When it comes to toys for anal play, the most important rule is to make sure it has a flared base so it doesn’t get lost inside you. Because yes, there are cases where patients get admitted to the ER because toys got stuck inside them!

I recommend toys made of an easy-to-clean material like silicone since it’s nonporous and hypoallergenic. For beginners, it can help to use toys that come in incremental sizes so you can start small and then move on to larger ones as you dare!

Check out our selection of Anal Toys here...

4. Should I use numbing creams and gels?

I wouldn’t really recommend it. Numbing creams and gels work by desensitizing your pain receptors in the anal tract. This overall decreases the sensation in the anus leading to a very boring experience. I’d suggest that you avoid this technique and use lubes to ease the sensation. Sure it will hurt for the first few times but not after that.

Tip: Instead of buying numbing creams and gels, opt for relaxing lubes. These lubricants have a lower percentage of lidocaine and benzocaine, so the numbing effect is far reduced. Therefore, you get the smooth pleasurable sensation in anal sex without losing out due to any weird numbing effect!

5. Do some positions make anal penetration easier than others?

There is undoubtedly no “one-size-fits-all” guide to anal sex positions. Even though being on top might make first-time anal a little easier as that allows more control over how deep the penetration goes and how slowly it happens. Also, as a bonus, there’s also the chance to add some clitoral stimulation if that’s your thing.
But yes, if you’re more experienced with anal, you can ask him to penetrate you from behind through doggy-style, spooning sex, or some other similar position. This can offer a “fuller” feeling if you know what I mean...
You or your partner can also provide some added clitoral stimulation in these positions.

6. What is a prostate orgasm?

Prostate orgasms, also known as prostate ejaculation or "prostate milking," involve the stimulation of the prostate gland in order to achieve sexual pleasure. The prostate gland is a small, walnut-sized gland located between the bladder and the penis that produces some of the fluid found in semen. Some people believe that prostate orgasms can be more intense and longer-lasting than traditional penile orgasms.

7. How to get a prostate orgasm?

Here are some steps you can try to stimulate the prostate and achieve a prostate orgasm:

  1. Start by relaxing and getting into a comfortable position. This might involve lying on your back with a pillow under your hips or sitting on a chair with your legs spread.
  2. Locate the prostate gland. It is located about 2 inches inside the anus, towards the front of the body.
  3. Use lube to make the experience more comfortable. Lubricants can help reduce friction and make the experience more pleasurable.
  4. Use your fingers or a prostate massager to stimulate the prostate gland. You can do this by inserting a finger or massager into the anus and gently rubbing or massaging the prostate gland. Some people prefer circular motions, while others prefer a back-and-forth motion. Experiment to see what feels best for you.
  5. Pay attention to your body's response. As you stimulate the prostate gland, you may experience a range of sensations, including pleasure, discomfort, or even the urge to urinate. This is normal and should not be a cause for concern.
  6. Experiment with different techniques and find what works best for you. Some people find that they enjoy prostate stimulation during solo play, while others prefer it during partnered sex.

8. Does he need to put on a condom?

Unless you and your partner are both sexually monogamous and have both been tested recently, you should use condoms during anal sex to reduce the risk of sexually transmitted infections like HIV. Yup you read that right, you can get STIs in your butt.
Using a new condom is especially important if you’re switching from anal to vaginal penetration so you can avoid moving bacteria from your anus to your vagina or urethra. Your anus is home to all kinds of bacteria, which your vagina and related parts aren’t used to—namely, gastrointestinal (G.I.) bacteria, like E. coli. When this bacteria reaches your vagina, it can cause vaginal infections, like bacterial vaginosis, which can lead to vaginal itching, burning during urination, a “fishy” vaginal odor, and discolored vaginal discharge. It can also spread to your urethra, where it can easily give rise to a urinary tract infection (UTI).

Long story short? If you insert anything into your anus, clean it off and/or roll on a fresh condom before putting it anywhere else.

9. Am I going to get poop on my partner or my toy…?

In anal play, once you get past your anus, anal sex takes place in your rectum, which isn’t really a storage area for poop unless you had to go to the bathroom minutes before getting pounded. That means the odds of you actually pooping on your partner mid-act are very, very low.

But unfortunately, as always, there’s a bit of a catch here. When you poop, your body should expel all the stool in your rectum, but some fecal matter might get left behind. While you probably don’t have to worry about pooping on your partner, you should know that they may be exposed to some visible or invisible fecal matter.

That said, no one needs to panic. It’s as simple as washing it off with soap and water (or changing the condom), washing your hands, and continuing on with your life, whether or not that means getting back to anal sex. But it’s definitely something that all parties should be aware of before you start.

10. Farting during and after anal sex. Is that normal?

It absolutely is! When you’re having anal sex, more often than not, the air gets pumped into your anal cavity. You might not realize it when you’re in the heat of the moment, but farting during penetration is very common. So don’t feel shy and let yourself loose. Do discuss this with your partner so that you both don’t end up having awkward moments in bed!

Nevertheless, if you feel bloated beyond the usual flatulence, do consult your doctor, as it might be an indication of some underlying medical problem.


I am sure that most of your queries will have been solved after reading this article. Anal sex is not just a random activity and more of a mutually understanding adventure which you both go on! It has its own ups and downs. As one of the few sexual activities which start off with pain but end up in ecstasy, anal sex is something I would recommend to every single couple. 

Last but not least, never skip the after-sex conversation. This is where both of you sit down together and talk about what was hot and what was not. These momentary discussions help clear out the picture and give both of you the much-needed understanding to spice up your upcoming sexual endeavors! At the end of the day, you must know that you are the one in charge of your body. Hence it is your responsibility to know all the nooks and crannies of the activity before indulging in it.

Written by Reny

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